This Is My Hole

(from http://planetpov.com/2011/04/11/gop-economics-how-to-become-taller-by-digging-holes/)

(Somewhere, I ran across a group of political definitions and so decided to make one of my own just for grins.)

The first rule of digging is when you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.  That said...

Definition of - 

Liberal: Someone who digs a series of holes until he finds the right spot. Unfortunately the hole is often way bigger than it needs to be.

Conservative: Someone who denies the existence of the need for the hole until he arrives at the right spot two years after the liberal has been there. Unfortunately, the hole is often filled in so much that no one else can fit.

Progressive: Someone who is moving toward the hole slightly faster than a conservative but with better aim than the liberal.

Tea Party: Someone who continues to deny the existence of the hole even while standing in it. He may also hide from the hole…possibly in Alaska.

Anarchist: Someone who wants to destroy the hole, has no idea what the hole means, and doesn’t really understand the hole.

Environmentalist: Someone who sees the hole as possibly detrimental to the ozone layer.

NRA Member: Someone who sees the hole as an opportunity to use his semi-automatic assault rifle with over-sized clip in the name of sport and the 2nd amendment.

Big Oil: Someone who sees the hole as a place to fill with seepage and then sprinkles dirt on top, pretending that there is less in the hole than there is.

Health Insurance company: Someone who sees the hole, covers the hole, and overcharges for the digging of the hole until no one can afford it and then denies having ever covered the hole.

Wall Street Broker: Has his own hole that no one will control.

Pundit: Someone who discusses the ramifications of the hole pretending he actually has knowledge about the hole and ultimately decides it must be education’s fault.

Modern Philanthropist: Someone who recognizes the need for the hole and then uses his vast wealth to create an entirely different set of parameters than what is needed, often involving the purchase and use of the product that gave him his vast fortune.

Centrist: Someone who knows and has always known exactly the right spot for the hole, why it is needed and how big and deep it should be. Unfortunately, he must wait for the liberal to quit digging and the conservative to catch up and the rest to understand the hole is everyone’s responsibility.

Who is on your list and what does their hole(s) look like?